Saturday 19 October 2019

I'm okay


As the title suggests, I'm doing okay. That is not to say I still don't have dark moments like I discussed in my previous post, and times where I've had to really concentrate on putting one foot in front of the other, but some days have been good, too. Like today. Today was very nice. I read through the three short stories that I have already self-published: Fancy That, The Dissection of Bryan Trout and My Town, then another that I published years ago under the pen name Lily Divine: Circle, which I've discussed many times on my blog already. I really enjoyed reading them today, and depending on my mood/emotional state, that is not always the case. I am reading through them again as, along with the four other short stories I wrote a few months ago, I am looking to really get them out there. But you know the drill; I hate book promotion, so we shall see what I actually do in reality to 'get them out there'.

I would really like to try this time though because I am finding leading a double life (one where I am working full-time then the other, finding any spare moment around it to work on my books and writing) exhausting. I think I have mentioned before that there are times where I feel tired down to my bones and long for real time off, and not just a handful of hours here and there where I've forced myself to go out or relax, but ended up feeling guilty the whole time. Even though I love my day job, which has not always been the case, I long to be a writer and spend my days dreaming up new stories and writing about the things that matter to me.

I've realised how negative I sound, and that is not me, so I shall stop now. With that being said, I am truly excited about my books and as time passes, I have realised the answer is just that: give it time. And so I will keep my head down, focus on putting one foot in front of the other when I need to and leave the rest up to fate.

Since my last post, I have mostly been editing the four short stories I wrote a few months ago then, as I've said already, I've read through the other four stories ready for, fingers crossed, a proper launch some time in November. I have a list as long as my arm of everything that needs to be done to make that a reality and I will of course be updating these dusty pages of the internet in due course sharing how I get on.

Because I am very silly, I have also decided to do NaNoWriMo this year - at least I *think* so anyway. I have an idea for a non-fiction book, so we'll see what happens. Very unlike me, I won't be putting any pressure on myself though and will just let it happen if it's going to happen if that makes sense. Go with the flow and all that.

I shall stop now and go to bed in a bit feeling a little more hopeful than I did yesterday, so there you go.

Until next time,
Cara x